Though I’ve been a diehard gymnastics fan for nearly three decades, I’m relatively new to the gymternet. I freely admit that I don’t always “get” the culture (and I still don’t understand what “yeet” means, in spite of many younger, cooler friends’ attempts to enlighten me). One of the things I find most baffling is the seeming unfamiliarity with social media mores and conventions demonstrated by high profile gymnast after high profile gymnast.
Numerous elite and NCAA gymnasts have faced significant fan backlash after making controversial statements on their public social media platforms, ranging from arguably insensitive but pretty benign (e.g., McKenna Kelley’s tweet about getting her nails done) to uninformed and potentially harmful (e.g., Danusia Francis retweeting of another athlete’s transphobic comment). In both of these recent instances, the gymternet’s response was swift and fierce. Like many a gymnast before them, Kelley and Francis’s immediate responses did little to alleviate the tension, instead further inflaming critics, mobilizing sympathizers and achieving no meaningful resolution (though, to Francis’s credit, she has since taken steps to engage with a trans fan and learn from him). They aren’t the first, and they certainly won’t be the last gymnasts to fall into this cycle.
Look, every single one of us has posted something we regret on social media. Most of us have the luxury of managing (or mismanaging) our stumbles in relative obscurity. However unfair, well-known athletes simply don’t get that luxury. While high profile gymnasts are not immune to these growing pains—and certainly deserve the same opportunities to learn, grow and develop—they are public figures and so will be subject to public scrutiny.
Though only a handful of gymnasts achieve “Simone Biles” levels of mainstream prominence, many elite and NCAA gymnasts are famous within the gymnastics community. That community, admittedly niche and insular, is filled with intensely passionate, devoted fans who are not only following but constantly dissecting everything gymnasts share. Despite their superhuman gymnastics skills, too many gymnasts are simply ill-prepared to handle the scrutiny that comes with their celebrity.
To be clear, I’m in no way advocating that gymnasts should “shut up and tumble;” they’re entitled to their views and can express them however they wish. However, this must be tempered by an awareness that their words and actions (regardless of intent) are up for interpretation and always have consequences. Dealing with those consequences, the good and the bad, is part of the gig.
So what’s the solution? Ideally, more elite and NCAA programs would offer public relations training or guidance for their athletes (but we probably shouldn’t hold our breath). Until that happens, gymnasts and gym nerds alike would greatly benefit from trying to understand why backlash occurs and how to respond to it in purposeful, productive ways.
Active language. However well-intentioned or genuine, qualified apologies—“I’m sorry if I offended anyone, but that wasn’t my intention”—read as insincere because they shift the blame away from the apologist. Active language—“I apologize for offending you and will be more mindful of the words I use in the future”—conveys ownership of one’s behavior and acknowledges its effect on others. This subtle shift in language adds credibility to an apology and is less likely to be rejected.
Self-reflection. It’s natural to get defensive when criticized and easy to dismiss any and all critics as “too sensitive” or just flat-out wrong. It’s much harder to ask, “What’s driving these reactions?” and “Am I wrong?” No one should tolerate blatant personal attacks or threats, but we have to differentiate between criticism and bullying. Blocking sprees (i.e., silencing those who criticize you, regardless of the tone or validity of their critique) may give a false sense of security but offer little opportunity for growth. If you continually block everyone who disagrees with you, you’re sending a clear message that you are not interested in considering other perspectives.
Receptiveness. The ease with which we can access information and interact with people online is both a blessing and a curse. Something you regard as funny or innocuous might be deeply hurtful or offensive to someone with different cultural or experiential frames of reference. Something you think or feel is true might be factually incorrect; despite the current internet ecosystem, some things are objectively true or false. Recognize that it is not anyone else’s job to educate you (particularly on their life experiences). If someone offers to engage in a respectful dialogue, listen with the understanding that this is just a first step; the burden to learn and grow is ultimately yours.
And when all else fails, it may be better to say nothing at all.
Article by Claire Billman
Special thanks to @hoo00lia for her thoughtful feedback and critiques.
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