It’s fun to watch rankings change every week, but they only tell us so much about the status of a team. Which teams are on the rise and which are barely hanging on? Which ones have a competitive ranking by the grace of their RQS drop scores and which will pose a real threat in postseason? I’ll dig into the real dynamics of NCAA gymnastics in this biweekly column that’s part power ranking, part high school yearbook awards—all serious analysis.
Just kidding, almost zero serious analysis.
Guys, I’ve watched a lot of gymnastics in the last seven-ish years of hardcore, Extremely Online gymnastics viewing. It’s gotten to the point that I’m hard to shock. I don’t really boggle at falls or injuries any more unless I really think someone is about to land head-first. But in these last few weeks I have seen some falls the likes of which I have never before witnessed in my life. This Stock Market is GIF-rich and none of them are GIFs of good gymnastics, so enjoy that.
(Shout-out to senior editor Mary Emma Burton for helping me make GIFs for a meet I couldn’t access on replay and desperately needed. She did an important public service.)
Flames Emoji
Southern Utah is well-known as a team with massive potential and equally massive consistency issues holding it back, so it felt so good to see the Thunderbirds conquer those demons and beat their program record a few weeks ago. Only 12 teams have a higher season high this year, so… spoiler for a round three regional spot? Maybe?
Great Except for That One Event
Instead of awarding this to a team, like usual, I’m going to give it to an entire meet. Oregon State vs. Utah was going GREAT, with both teams on track for season highs, before a few routines into the last rotation when everybody decided to simultaneously lose their heads and count falls! That was fun. Don’t know if I’ve ever seen a gymnast fall on a gainer pike beam dismount before, much less a top-team DI gymnast.
Why Is This Happening
Everyone’s got the freaking flu! What’s with the flu this year? At LEAST three gymnasts each at UCLA and Cal have had it, plus Kennedi Davis, Sabrina Vega, Aspen Tucker, Mei Li Costa, Nya Reed and very likely more we just haven’t heard about. It’s getting to the point that we should probably cancel all post-meet autograph sessions for fear of contaminating the children.
(Real talk—I was never a gymnast—how often does the equipment get cleaned? When I was in ballet, we’d take a Clorox wipe to the barres at the beginning of every class. Is that a thing in gymnastics? If not, it’s maybe time to make it one.)
You’re Beautiful but Please Hit
Natalie Wojcik is not having a bad year per se, but she’s having a bit of a situation. A “fell three weeks out of six so far” situation. A “ranked outside of the top thirty in the nation in the all around right now” situation. It’s probably unfair to dump the whole thing on her, but it really feels like when she gets her ducks in a row, Michigan as a broader concept will follow her and suddenly start threatening the top teams again.
Save of the Week
Quietly Cruising
Iowa State is doing otherworldly gymnastics this year, and while highlights like Makayla Maxwell’s 9.950 vault and Andrea Maldonado’s Randi on floor have gotten some attention on Twitter, the Cyclones are still very much under the radar compared to ranking neighbors like Arkansas and Oregon State.
On the Struggle Bus
Anyone who actually wants to watch Cal gymnastics, because there have been fluke stream outages for the last THREE Cal meets. At ASU, the feed never came up. At home versus Utah, we lost an entire rotation and this week’s Stanford meet was… well, are there ever not tech issues at Stanford?
Do You Have a Seventh (Sixth) Routine
Denver recently confirmed that both Lynnzee Brown and Mia Sundstrom are out for the season so……..things are about to get a little tight for the Pioneers. Like, “we’ve been scratching our vault exhibition and she’s now one of only five vaults our entire team can do” tight. Theoretically there are six routines on all of the other events, but as they’re run in we might see some more five-up lineups in Denver.
Was That Just a Fluke
I’m going to say it very quietly so I don’t jinx anything: ᴺᵒʳᵗʰ ᶜᵃʳᵒˡᶦⁿᵃ ʰᶦᵗ ᵃ ᵇᵃʳˢ ʳᵒᵗᵃᵗᶦᵒⁿ. And got a great team total to boot. It’s hard not to root for the Tar Heels, whose weakness has been so persistent and so crippling for years. I can’t promise that the torment is over, but it felt so good to see it happen once.
Next Week, I Swear
Auburn’s never been the most reliable, but it can usually put together a few great meets by midseason and show us that tuning in every week is worth our effort. That’s coming soon, right?
…….right?
Won Twitter For The Week
Who doesn’t cry when walk-on athletes are surprised by their coaches with a scholarship? I definitely cry.
A big congratulations to @alisonier for earning a scholarship next year! Ali has been a key contributor to the team’s success and is always working hard, both in and out if the gym! 〽️
Fitting that she is also last week’s winner for Love the Battle! pic.twitter.com/lIVzJv39Y7
— Minnesota Women’s Gym (@GopherWGym) February 18, 2020
Glad You’re Having Fun
Not all heroes wear capes pic.twitter.com/rvjwfmx4j0
— Daniel (@Daniel_san2013) February 15, 2020
I Don’t Know Who Needs to Hear This, But…
When someone may have done crime stuff, the best way to figure out if they in fact did do the crime stuff is probably not to ask them “Hey, did you do crime stuff?” because duh, of course they will tell you they didn’t and are the victim of a grand-scale injustice that the world just doesn’t understand.
(I don’t know if she actually did crime stuff. I’m happy to be persuaded otherwise, and I’d love almost nothing more than a dramatic tell-all Notes app screenshot finally explaining to us what REALLY happened with the crime stuff. But telling me she’s always been very nice to you isn’t that compelling to me.)
Falls of the Week
There were ten minutes in the middle of Washington @ Stanford where everything imaginable went wrong, and it was kind of the best.
Article by Rebecca Scally
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Usually being arrested and charged is a decent indication of someone dabbling in crime stuff…